The Portrait!!!

A clever elderly woman decided to have her portrait painted, so she told the artist, "Paint me with diamond earrings, a diamond necklace, an emerald bracelet and a gold Rolex."

"But you're not wearing any of those things!" artist pointed out.

"I know," she said. "It's in case I die before my husband. If he remarries right away, I want his new wife to go crazy looking for the jewelry." 

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